# USA

United States of America (also United Shitholes of America, burgerland, USA, US or just "murika") is the biggest [tumor](cancer.md) on [Earth](earth.md), a [dystopian](dystopia.md) imperialist country of fat, stupid idiots enslaved by [capitalism](capitalism.md), either rightist or [pseudoleftist](pseudoleft.md) [fascists](fascism.md) endlessly obsessed with [money](money.md), [wars](war.md), [fighting](fight_culture.md), shooting their presidents and shooting up their schools (rampage shooting is their national sport). Other things they like include guns, oil, throwing nuclear bombs on cities, detonating nuclear bombs in the sea and crashing planes into their own skyscrapers so that they can invade other countries for more oil. Spread of the toxic American culture over whole world is now like a plague, but it's yet worse than cholera and black death combined. USA consists of 50 states located in North America, a continent that ancestors of Americans invaded and have stolen from Indians, the natives whom Americans mass murdered. Americans are stupid idiots with guns who above all value constant societal conflict and make the world so that all people are dragged into such conflict. It's the land of the freak and the home of the [slave](work.md).

You may have been led to naively believe USA is something of a superior country but it's a beginner mistake to think that, it's merely a country that's shouting the loudest and tries to be seen as much as possible, it is like the popular blonde [chick](woman.md) in your class that everyone is giving attention because she's wearing tons of makeup and is bitching and crying all the time, however despite the attention you can bet in any other way she's most definitely the stupidest, least interesting human in the room. Just think of what USA is best known for:

- By far most mass shootings in the world.
- Most obese country in the world.
- High crime rates.
- High [homeless](homelessness.md) rates.
- No universal healthcare.
- No universal education.
- Priority in armament, war and imperialism.
- No free public services or any kind of social security.
- Most [ads](marketing.md) in the world, ads on every corner, manipulation by media.
- Culture of [money](money.md), greed, conflict, self interest, [overworking](work.md) and unrestrained [capitalism](capitalism.md), [toxic](toxic.md) obsession with appearance and shallow values, ridicule and opposition of [selflessness](selflessness.md), [pacifism](pacifism.md), [sharing](communism.md), mercy with criminals and other objectively GOOD values.
- Spawned the worst [corporations](corporation.md) in the world.
- Constant issues with violence, guns, [racism](racism.md), looting, environment destruction, poverty etc.
- [Historically](history.md) known for mafia, genocide, stealing land, civil war, nuking cities with innocent civilians, war crimes, invading other countries etc.
- ...

And the good things? [Zero](zero.md). Really, pause for a moment and try to come up with anything good. Can we really consider THIS a GOOD example of a country by ANY stretch at all? Only a lunatic could.

{ Sorry to some of my US frens :D I love you <3 ~drummyfish }

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*Use as your [toilet paper](shit.md).*

More than anything USA resembles [North Korea](north_korea.md), main difference being that USA actually acts on their promises of war and attacks other countries instead of just talking about it. Apart from this we only find striking similarities: in both countries citizens are successfully led to believing their country is the greatest and have strong propaganda based on [cults of personality](cult_of_personality.md), which to outsiders seem very ridiculous but which is nevertheless very effective: for example North Korea officially proclaims their supreme leader Kim Jong-il was born atop a sacred mountain and a new star came to existence on the day of his birth, while Americans on the other hand believe one of their retarded leaders named George Washington was a divine god who was PHYSICALLY UNABLE TO TELL A LIE, which was actually taught at their schools. North Korea is ruled by a single political party, US is ruled by two practically same militant capitalist imperialist parties (democrats and republicans), i.e. de-facto one party as well. Both countries are obsessed with weapons (especially nuclear ones) and their military, both are highly and openly [fascist](fascism.md) (nationalist). Both countries are full of extreme [propaganda](propaganda.md), [censorship](censorship.md) and [hero culture](hero_culture.md), people worship dictators such as Kim Jong-un or [Steve Jobs](steve_jobs.md). US is even worse than North Korea because it exports its toxic [culture](culture.md) all over the whole world and constantly invades other countries, it is destroying all other cultures and leads the whole world to doom and destruction of all life, while North Korea basically only destroys itself.

In US mainstream [politics](politics.md) there exists no true left, only [right](left_right.md) and [pseudoleft](pseudoleft.md). It is only in deepest underground, out of the sun's rays and sight of the public eye, where on rare occasion sometimes something of value comes to existence as an exception to the general rule that nothing good comes from the US. One of these exceptions is [free software](free_software.md) (established by [Richard Stallman](rms.md)) which was however quickly smothered by the capitalist [open source](open_source.md) counter movement. Also the [hippie](hippies.md) movement was kind of cool, and here and there a good videogame or movie happens to be made in the US, but remember you have to sift through an ocean of crap to find a small nugget of gold here.

On 6th and 9th August 1945 **USA murdered about 200000 civilians**, most of whom were innocent men, women and children, by throwing atomic bombs on Japanese cities Hiroshima and Nagasaki. The men who threw the bombs and ordered the bombing were never put on trial, actually most Americans praise them as [heroes](hero_culture.md) and think it was a good thing to do.

**Americans are uber retarded**^([source: my brain]) for example in trying to somehow pursue both [self interest](self_interest.md) and "social equality", it's extremely ridiculous, an american brain is literally incapable of imagining someone who doesn't at his core work on the basis of self interest, so the American that tries to identify with "wanting equality and human rights" just comes up with hugely fucked up arguments like ["SKIN COLOR IS JUST ILLUSION THEREFORE WE ARE ALL EQUAL"](political_correctness.md) -- because he inevitably sees differences implying oppression because self interest just cannot be not present (this idea won't even occur for a second to him during his whole lifetime, it's simply something he NEVER can physically think), his mind is hard wired to be unable of grasping the idea of accepting difference between people while giving up the self interest of falling to [fascism](fascism.md) as a consequence. Similar arguments are encountered e.g. regarding [vegetarianism](vegetarianism.md): an American supporting vegetarianism will resort to denying evolution, biology and anatomy and will argue something like "HUMANS ARE HERBIVORES BECAUSE THIS FEMINIST SCIENTIST SAYS IT AND MEAT KILLS US SO WE MUST NOT EAT IT", again because he just thinks that admitting meat is healthy to us automatically implies we have to eat it because self interest is just something that's an inherent part of laws of physics; a normal (non retarded) vegetarian will of course admit not eating meat at all is probably a bit unhealthy, but it's a voluntary choice made of altruistic love towards other living beings who now don't have to die for one's tastier food.

USA also has the worst [justice](justice.md) system in the world, they literally let angry mob play judges in actual courts, they pick random trash from the streets (similarly to how they choose their presidents) and let them decide someone's guilt for giving them free lunch, which they call "jury duty". Lawyers are not so much lawyers as actors, trained in theatrical language and gestures to psychologically push 80 IQ scumbags to perceive someone as a criminal or not, the "judge" only sits there on his ass and watches the circus unfold. This is not a [joke](jokes.md), look it up, in USA you'll literally be judged by random amateurs who have no clue about law and will just judge you based on whether they like your face or not. You can't make this up.

{ "List of atrocities by the United States" is the longest page on leftypedia :-) https://wiki.leftypol.org/wiki/List_of_atrocities_committed_by_the_United_States. ~drummyfish }

Here is a comparison of average European country before and after infestation with American culture (judged by Czech Republic, the author's country of residence, but it's more or less the same in whole EU):

| what                          | before US culture (~1990s) | after US culture (~2020s) |
| ----------------------------- | -------------------------- | ------------------------- |
| mass shootings                | no                         | yes                       |
| [feminazism](feminism.md)     | no                         | yes                       |
| [gay fascism](lgbt.md)        | no                         | yes                       |
| [slavery](work.md)            | mild                       | extreme                   |
| public toilets                | yes                        | no                        |
| free healthcare               | yes                        | no                        |
| corruption                    | mild                       | extreme                   |
| youtubers                     | no                         | yes                       |
| Santa Claus                   | no                         | yes                       |
| ads                           | mild                       | unbearable, aggressive    |
| morality                      | sometimes                  | no                        |
| idiots                        | some                       | all                       |
| [free speech](free_speech.md) | mostly                     | no                        |
| [Apple](apple.md)             | no                         | yes                       |
|[privacy](privacy.md) hysteria | no                         | yes                       |
| social security               | yes                        | no                        |
| old age pension               | yes                        | no                        |
|[fear culture](fear_culture.md)| no                         | extreme                   |
| update culture, consumerism   | mostly not                 | extreme                   |
| powerty                       | none                       | extreme                   |
| financial crisis              | no                         | yes                       |
| society collapsing            | no                         | yes                       |
| [art](art.md) and culture     | good                       | none                      |
| [toxicity](toxic.md)          | rare                       | extreme                   |
| [technology](tech.md)         | fine                       | worst in history          |
| plastic surgery abominations  | no                         | yes                       |
| TV content to ad ratio        | > 10                       | < 1                       |
| wanted to commit suicide      | no                         | yes                       |
| society worked                | kinda                      | no                        |

**USA <3 [imperialism](imperialism.md).** In general it goes like this: there is some jungle tribe that has figured life out, they don't have to work much, lie down all day, have sex with anyone they like, have no money, walk around naked, are generally happy. USA sees their resources and they go: "Hey, you need some [DEMOCRACY](democracy.md). We'll take your fields but we'll build a factory there and GIVE YOU [JOBS](work.md). It's not slavery, you'll just be in the factory for 12 hours each day doing repetitive tasks, then you give half of the money you make there to us so that you can keep the land on which you have your hut -- no, it's not slavery, we don't use that word anymore, we call it [capitalism](capitalism.md). We'll teach you what [racism](racism.md) and [feminism](feminism.md) is. We'll build you MCdonalds in your village. We'll kill the jungle in 100km radius along with all life in it, but we'll give you a device to manage your finance and as a bonus it will be showing you ads all day so you don't even have to look around at all the mayhem, you'll just be watching the display, OK? You're welcome."

In [Europe](europe.md), or maybe just anywhere else in the world, you are afraid of getting hit by a car because you might die, in America you afraid of it because you couldn't afford the ambulance bill and would get into unpayable debt (yes, even if you pay "health insurance"). You can literally find footage of half dead people running away from ambulances so that they don't have to go to debt for being kept alive. In Europe you are afraid to hit someone with a car because you might kill him, in America you are afraid of it because he might sue you. This is not an exaggeration or [joke](jokes.md), it's literally how it is -- it's incredible how people can believe the country is somehow "more advanced", it is quite literally the least developed country in history.

To touch on another subject Americans would rather love the world to forget about, in 1920 the so called "land of freedom" banned drinking alcohol so that capitalist slaves could spend less time on fun and more time on slavery, this was known as the prohibition and led to skyrocketing of organized crime. Another pinnacle of stupidity indeed. This lasted over a decade.

Alright so now that we're done with the important, we might as well relax and examine a more lighthearted stuff: what are the things typical of the big shiny USA (see also [stereotypes](stereotype.md))? **It's the little differences**. For example: driving a bicycle and throwing newspapers onto houses of other people who all have a [dog](dog.md) trained to catch and bring the newspaper in the house (stopping the bike would mean losing time and time is [money](money.md)). Or school buses. State borders, roads and city layouts are always rectangular and perpendicular, no organic or curved shapes. Road signs and traffic lights are also all slightly wrong, for example the lines on roads are yellow instead of white, your lights are on the OPPOSITE side of the crossroad etc. Little children are required to dissect frogs at school. Additionally they have to memorize names of all the presidents and salute the flag to the sound of national anthem every morning so that they can grow up to be unbiased, independently thinking adults. For some reason child abduction is part of American culture, as well as people randomly going missing or casually disappearing for decades -- whenever you step into a super market, walls are covered by photos of missing people. It's unbelievable and something hard to understand for a European. Toilets are always in bathroom, which Europeans find DISGUSTING. In shops you will meet "baggers" -- employees paid to put your groceries in your bag, you can't make this up. Everyone is suing everyone constantly, no divorce or even a minor traffic incident is complete without a lawsuit over horrendous sums, that's why it's completely normal to be a billionaire for a week and then live another week as a hobo under a bridge because you slapped your secretary's ass, then next week you become a millionaire because you were lucky to be hit by a car and sue the driver and so on, and extremes like this are completely normal: criminals for example get sentences to hundreds or thousands of years in jail plus several lifetimes on top just to make it more dramatic, whole cities catch fire or get swallowed by sinkholes, tornadoes routinely disrupt school classes etc. In general everything is much more extreme in America, roads and sidewalks are wider because cars, as well as people, are larger, skyscrapers start to reach outer space now, crazy people are REALLY crazy, loud people are REALLY loud, the gap between rich and poor is larger and more noticeable than anywhere else in the world. Next are disgusting manners in eating, roasting marshmallows, drinking wine from plastic cups, putting peanut butter and jam on everything and having all food, including bread, sweetened to just short of lethal dosage, to a degree that would unironically be illegal in the EU, that's all very typical of the US (it is by the way also why gargantuously fat people are a real issue there, they must have special toilets, special seats on a plane and so on). { I don't even fkn know what peanut butter tastes like, no one eats that shit in Europe lol. ~drummyfish } Also weird pseudosports and illogical measurement units, and obsession with worker unions (in USA it's assumed by default the employer will be exploiting you to maximum and will eventually murder you and sell your organs and the culture dictates you must defend yourself, else the murder isn't even his fault, you're stupid for not having defended yourself). In the US dentists don't give you anesthetics before a surgery like one would expect from a sane doctor, probably because that would be too expensive and not entertaining enough for the paying customer -- no, they rather give you LSD or some kinda similar shit after which you get high as a kite, you can literally find footage of people going from the dentist being drugged like a street whore, this is not normal. Everyone makes such a big deal of high school graduation and the "prom", it's unreal -- everywhere else in the world no one gives a single shit about high school graduation because it's what everyone above 80 IQ will do, at best people are happy to finally get outta the shithole, but in the US it's like your bar micva or wedding. Smaller children are selling lemonade and cookies to random strangers in the streets, learning the filthy capitalist practices even before they learn to read; garage sales are typical and very popular also. There is too much over the top friendliness, emotion, anger, agreement and disagreement: everyone is very vocal about what's currently on his mind and has to signal it with exaggerated body language, happy people are hugging each other, kissing, singing and dancing, annoyed people are waving guns and flags and shouting at each other over the street, traffic jams are a shitfest of car horns and people shouting and shooting guns, and then sometimes in the streets complete strangers will smile at you and talk to you for no reason. In USA no one is truly American because people came to steal the land just recently, so everybody is in fact some kind of Euro or Asian degenerate, everyone's like "hey bro, I'm Italian Irish and Portuguese from mother's side but I'm actually 1/17th Polish Jew so I'm very, VERY sensitive to discussing the Holocaust". People are so lazy they can't even get out of their car to pick up their food and they LITERALLY have cinemas for cars so that people do not have to get out of a car and walk to the seat, all of which further contributes to the obesity of the American nation. Americans are also close to monkeys in their behavior: as an example when an American experiences even minor success, he starts dancing and jumping around, doing what's called a "victory dance", it's something extremely cringe to behold, literally an adult behaving like a 3 year old. Everything is very far apart in the US and people commonly travel from state to state and coast to coast just cause they feel like it or out of boredom, to get to the shop you must first drive 3 hours through barren desert by a completely straight road, people travel hundreds and thousands of kilometers (sorry, miles!) -- upon settling in a new place one must go and greet all the neighbors and inform them that he's a convicted [pedophile](pedophilia.md) while bringing cake as a welcome gift. In bigger cities you also cannot live without a car because even though shops are relatively near, there are NO SIDEWALKS leading to them, they literally cannot be accessed on foot, building sidewalks that could be used even by poor people FOR FREE would be seen as [communism](communism.md). Yes, this is absolutely ridiculous, but completely normal in the USA. EVERY SINGLE house must have American flag in front -- the bigger, the better -- [fascism](fascism.md) is completely normal, people don't even see it as weird. Nomadic life, temporary homelessness, living in a caravan or just in your car on a parking lot -- that's nothing uncommon either, but a [homeless](homelessness.md) in America is much different from European hobo: in America homelessness is like catching cold, it just happens from time to time to everyone, even to a CEO or rich lawyer, but it literally only means you have no house, you just go sleep in your car instead of your home, but that's not much of an issue because you live at work anyway, so a homeless guy is still a slave, he goes to [slavery](work.md) like he would if he had a house -- that is very stupid and weird. Houses in America look luxurious but it's fake as everything else, they are built with no solid foundation and have walls made of cardboard and polystyrene that a slightly stronger breeze will destroy, it's all just about the external look, like the whole glorious US.

Also [LMAO](lmao.md), in normal countries you get to a university when you're smart and have good grades -- smart people should study and do some intellectual work, makes sense, right? But not so in America. There you get to a university if you're A) rich, or B) good at some sport (see also [Forrest Gump](forrest_gump.md)). WTF is this? Imagine a brain surgeon is gonna operate on you and you're like "Doc, how good were you at school?" and he replies "I was pretty stupid and barely passed with Es, but I was really good at handegg." They'll make people study history of poetry because they're good at weightlifting? Fucking greatest country ever :D

{ I gotta say now I came to know more than one, or even two people from the US who are exceptions from all the, well, "negativity" I've just written (but only because I couldn't write anything positive), in fact they often leave me speechless with how fantastic and amazing they are, who absolutely make me wish I could be more like them. No words can adequately describe it -- anyway my point is your country of origin cannot stop you from being good, I rely on the basic sense of reason that no one can possibly take everything I write as an unbreakable fundamental law of nature -- I dislike pointing this out because it should be obvious by logic, but I really hope it's pretty clear sometimes I use hyperbole, irony and similar devices to get some points across. But then again please don't take the article as a joke, it IS absolutely serious, USA is a dystopia and hell on Earth. ~drummyfish }

## See Also

- [Elvis](elvis.md)
- [shithole](shithole.md)
- [dystopia](dystopia.md)
- [imperialism](imperialism.md)
- [USSR](ussr.md)
- [North Korea](north_korea.md)
- [McDonald's](mcdonalds.md)
- [Coca Cola](coca_cola.md)